Struggling Mind

© RedCat

Struggling mind
Swirling around
Trying peace to find

Anxious mind
Startling allround
No grace to be found

Fear filled mind
Urging to hide
Don’t hope for something kind

Stormclouded mind
Rejecting bright sunshine
Closing heart to hopes deep mine

Abuse programmed mind
Cued to put me down
All affirmations hollow find

Lonesome mind
Echoing soul’s cry
Loving kindness unfulfilled prophecy

Bleak depressed kind
Millions lonely just wanting to be found
Today meditation couldn’t ease my mind

© REDCAT

In September last year, meaning the first month back blogging, I wrote a piece called Bad day, about the days that PTSD and my clinical depression puts me so low I would like to just go hide. (Or die depending on how bad it gets.)

Today was such a day when the fact there’s no one to reach out to, felt like the worst thing ever, all I wanted was to hide away and cry.

Instead I did my meditation, tried to go about my day as normal and dragged myself to practice (since we’re advised physical distance rather then lockdown). It didn’t really help, but tomorrow I’ll know I did most of what I aimed today. And hopefully that will give me something.

From one depressed soul to all others

All my love and take care of yourself!

Picture by Peggy und Marco Lachmann-Anke from Pixabay

GloPoWriMo 2020

DAY 1 – Build a New Start
DAY 2 – Beloved Bookstore
DAY 3 – Sunshine and Hail
DAY 4 – Isolation Dating
DAY 5 –Staring out a Windowpane
DAY 6 – Casanova Comes Closer
DAY 7 – Swirling Colors of my Mind
DAY 8 – White – Red – Black
DAY 9 – Different World After
DAY 10 – Spring Hay(na)ku
DAY 11 – Love – Hay(na)ku
DAY 12 – Make Art – Triolet inspired
by Neil Gaiman and Chris Riddell
DAY 13 – What did you think would happen
to a child left on my doorstep?
DAY 14 – Ballad of the Lost Poet
DAY 15 – Writer’s class – Hay(na)ku
DAY 16 – What is a Nomad without a Tribe?
DAY 17 – Pale Spring, Here Again, Nature Awake
DAY 18 – Spring Day in the Garden
DAY 19 – Close Couplets
DAY 20 – Lost in Love’s First Flush
DAY 21 – She Tasted Like Memory
DAY 22 – Struggling Mind
DAY 23 – Written in the book of dust
DAY 24 – At the end of every week, Friday-Cozy!
DAY 25 – Slip, Crack, Shatter
DAY 26 – Humans Really Don’t Know
DAY 27 – April Rain
DAY 28 – Greeting the Watch Horse
DAY 29 – Letter of Hope
DAY 30 – Witches Walpurgis Night Preparation

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